Tuesday, April 16, 2013

I Did It!!!

As you all know or have been aware of I had a bit of a rough start. I began the new life for me and my little one's with nothing. I wish I could say I had the ability to start off with a car, money in the bank, and a plan for success. But the reality of it is the latter.

The night that my little sister and my babies with the German shepherd in tow was well to say the least not a planned departure. It was a "Get the Hell Out of Dodge" trip. And for those of you that say I should have been a bit more prepared, I agree. But there are those changes in our lives that are not planned, or mapped out. This was one of those.

So after coming to a great little ski town of Red Lodge, Mt I was far from prepared for the challenges that would befall me and the babies. I was aware that working was a necessity and that the finding of a home was a must. But silly me thought in my little Polly Anna way that jobs would be readily available due to having 3 college degrees under my belt. To be honest I resorted to the first jobs that I started out with as a teen! Waitressing, Bartending, Cleaning Hotel Rooms, and being a Secretary. Ya for some odd reason my Advanced Degree in Forensic Psychology was not in high demand (except in divorce court)

Well I did what I had to do. I worked 3 and 4 jobs at a time, and I was always looking for the day when I could have just 1 job. This was my dream! To have a day when I came home and made dinner, ate with my babies, and didn't have to rush off to another job before they even sat down to eat. To be honest the first 3 years were the hardest I have lived through just because of the fear that engulfed me. I was constantly in fear of not being able to make enough just to get by, and with no help from the Frog Prince you can imagine how just having a little one come down with a cold could derail the small amount of money I made for 6 months. Having 4 children is well to be blunt expensive, and with out insurance it is the scariest thing EVER!

When I say that the money was hard to come by I mean it. I have had to depend on tips just to pay my rent. I have had my electricity turned off because it was so late, but when a mother has to choose food for the babies or heat its a pretty bad place to be. This was a struggle that I can honestly say I didn't face alone. There were great people in the town that literally were my glimmer of hope when the darkness had become so heavy it was all I could do to put one foot in front of the other.

My children were by far the biggest strength that I had. I had no choice but to succeed for them. I couldn't just sit and cry about how unfair my life had become, or how I just wanted to give up. It has never been about me, it has ALWAYS been about them. I knew that they had lost everything that they had in their world. To see your children loose just the basics toys, beds, clothes, dressers, shoes, furniture to sit on, and TV. You are either lit by the fire to make things better, or you are going to just sit and wallow in the disaster that has become your life. I chose to make things better.

We started out in a great empty apartment. I had two mattresses on the floor in one of the bedrooms. No blankets, pillows, hell we didn't even have towels! But with hand me downs, kind hearts, and more hours of waitressing, cleaning, and typing then I can count we gradually worked towards normalcy. I had no kitchen stuff not a fork, plate, or cup! Forget about cooking I had no pots or pans! But when you ask you will receive! God provided just what we needed!

I still have hung on to the old pots and pans that a boss of mine gave to me so that I could make dinner's for my babies and even though they are far past their prime I still love to make food in them just for the memories that they hold of that first meal that I made in our little apartment. You see I found as did my children that the little things and I mean the really little things are what truly mattered. Heck when you go from washing your babies clothes in your bathtub because you can't afford the Laundromat you will cherish getting to  have the luxury of washing your clothes in a washer and dryer!

Now though the struggles were numerous the blessings outweighed them daily! I remember getting the opportunity to apply for a job at a local Woman's Clothing Store downtown by a friend I had met through getting coffee. It was this chance interview that would change the course of my life far more than I could have ever imagined.

The job was a fill in position at first, so I added it to my other 3 jobs with ease. Then the position opened to be full time for the summer which I welcomed since believe it or not cleaning hotel rooms was not my favorite pastime(shocking I know! Its so glamorous ;) After starting the job at the store I fell in LOVE! The people were amazing, the girls I worked for were so smart, talented, and driven it was hard not to stride to be better and work harder!

Eventually the job started to change my life as well. I was able to cut down to 2 jobs, and I gained two very sweet and dear friends. These girls kept me grounded, in check, and well to be honest they wouldn't allow me to settle for anything! So with the love of these girls and the constant hand of God showing he was there just to help me get through all of the obstacles of life that often came my way.

I found that once I worked to try and gain in one area in my life there was always another challenge or two in my path. This was just well the way things seemed to work out. I know there are many of you who can relate. Its that slippery path of two steps forward three steps back. To say that I didn't end up having a constant battle would be a lie. Even when things would go good there was always those things to upset the apple cart. I struggled with this daily!

Then there was an opportunity that came to pass that to this day I never believed could happen! The store that I had grown to love, was offered to me to purchase. This folks is not something that happens to a girl like me. I can't tell you how hard it was to wrap my head around the plan. I was beyond scared! Heck it took literally a year of just trying to go through the motions of the idea to get myself to believe I could do it. My husband was beyond supportive, heck my boss believed wholeheartedly in me and my success. Me well believe it or not I was the one who just had backed myself into a corner of "What ifs", and to be quite honest I allowed Fear to engulf me.

It took a long talk in a car, and some stellar iPod music (wink, wink) to get me to see that I could bet on ME. I mean come on if I could succeed with nothing and get to where I was, this opportunity was bound to succeed as long as I bet on ME. So that's what I did.

On April 1, 2013 I purchased Sagebrush Sirens!!!!!! This was the first thing that I have EVER bought with a bank!!!! I have never bought a car, or even a home! You forget I didn't even have a check book! So with my Boss Miss Ryan Sankey, and my husband Joe Enos, I sat and signed papers saying that I could make this store a success! To say I was scared is soooooo a understatement! I was so shaky and nervous, the last time I felt this feeling was the day me and the babies left Wyoming during a snowstorm. But the difference this time? I know God has led me to this path, and that he has my back! I have an amazing husband who believes in me with his whole heart! And I have the skills, training, and experience with this business all because Ryan took a gamble that day and hired a mom of four who had no previous experience selling a thing, and who's resume was on one page.

So today I type this blog as a Store Owner! To those of you who think that you can never change the path you are on, I say this "You are stronger than you realize"  I can honestly say that if you asked me in 2009 were I saw my future I would have been telling you that waitressing and bartending was what it was going to be just to get my babies taken care of. I never dreamed that in 2013 I would be here, and thank God for that! Though I took the harder path to were I am now, I am grateful for all of the lessons and life experiences that have brought me here and made me who I truly am. Sometimes we can learn more on a dirt road than we can in cruise control on the pavement of life.

Check out my stores website!!!!